Reply To: Picking up women

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Hi Brad,

In order for me to keep answering your questions, the next time you return to the forum, I want an account of some action that you have taken to talk to a woman.

To approach a woman in public, just stop her and ask for her help with something.

It could be as simple as, “Excuse me, I was just wondering if I could get your opinion on something?”

As long as she is not in a hurry, she will most likely agree and be all ears.

Perhaps you are thinking about buying a pair of shoes that day and can’t quite figure out which kind to get.

Fashion is often a topic that women enjoy.

You could even show her pictures on your smartphone of the shoes that you are looking to buy and ask her what she thinks.

Using this tactic will often bring the both of you even closer physically which helps in breaking tension.

After she gives you a suggestion, you could use that opportunity to both thank her and ask her to lunch or coffee.

If she likes you, she will give you her number.

To approach a woman in a shop, it is best to build some rapport with her first, over time.

This is because women are often hesitant to get personal with customers at work.

Just ask this particular woman to help you with something at the shop.

In the process of her helping you, ask her some lighthearted questions about herself.

Perhaps you hear an accent and ask her if she is from a particular part of the country.

She proceeds to tell you where she is from as she is in the process of helping you and you can use this to ask her further questions about where she is from.

This is all lighthearted banter.

After she has helped you, be sure to thank her and tell her your name.

Come back to the shop relatively soon. No more than a week later.

When you come in, be sure to mention a particular detail or more that she divulged when talking to you about where she was from the last time around.

That will refresh her memory and will make her feel that much more special that you remembered those details.

This is how you effectively build rapport with her over time.

When you remember details in this way, she will be more open to divulging even more details about herself as time goes on with very little prompting from you, if any.

Perhaps she moved from a part of the country that has a beach and she tells you about how much she misses it.

Again, remember all the personal details that she gives you.

You will use these details the next time around when you come back to the shop so as to trigger her memory and continuously build rapport.

Eventually, she will start remembering and addressing you by name.

She will look forward to talking to you.

She will feel more of a personal connection with you.

The kind that she doesn’t have with other clients.

Once you have reached this point, flirt with her lightheartedly.

It could be a compliment or flirtatious joke.

If she responds positively to it by either complimenting you back or flirting back, you should use that as your opportunity to ask her out.

Again Brad, whether you choose to approach a woman who works behind a counter at a shop or a woman in public, when you return to the forum, I want an account of what you have done.

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