Reply To: As a guy, how many dates will you pay for before feeling uncomfortable?

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#62017

Luke
Keymaster

Hi Patrick,

When it comes to dating, everyone has something that makes them feel uncomfortable to the point where they regard it as a deal breaker. For you, it’s a woman who doesn’t offer to pay for anything on a second date. You may have had some history with women in the past who went on multiple dates with you that never got anywhere, leaving a bitter taste in your mouth and making you feel as though they had taken you for a ride.

This is for women that you have met on dating sites and women that you have met in real life. That made you rethink how you go about dating and you decided to start using a litmus test.

Date two would be your litmus test. If she doesn’t offer to pay for anything on the second date, you would take that as a sign of a woman who would never make a good partner. Do understand that some women are very traditional when it comes to dating.

They let the man lead in the beginning. Yes, this means that the man pays for the first few dates. However, it doesn’t mean that this is how it will always be. Once she reaches a point where she feels comfortable in knowing that this guy is for real, she may start paying for some dates or even cook for you.

Now, if you have found that using the second date as a litmus test has been working for you, do you. It does sound like you are no longer single. But, if you find yourself single at some point in the foreseeable future, it wouldn’t hurt to try a different approach in increasing the threshold of dates to a greater number.

Giving it at least three dates before deciding to ditch her if she doesn’t offer to pay for anything could be a much better experience for you and may keep you from missing out on some really great potential relationship partners.

If you are worried about the financial exposure, the dates don’t have to be expensive. There are lots of relatively inexpensive dates that you can go on with her from taking walks to meeting for coffee or a smoothie. This way, you can last for a few more dates without ditching the woman too prematurely.

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