A girl from my (social group) rejected me

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  • #53881 Reply

    Orion
    Click here to help answer someone else's question.

    A little backstory:

    In Feb of 2020.
    A girl joined to my social group I go to
    (it’s a group that helps people get over social anxiety and mental problems)
    I fell in love with her..

    A month later she gave me a hint that she was interested and I was in her too so I decided to initiate.

    It was a success!
    During COVID-Lockdown we remotely watched movies,
    we did some video calls, we had fun and we really gotten along together.

    One time I even got the opportunity to meet her in person in her street and we’ve had a fun walk at night together (but sadly we didn’t kiss)

    In April she started to act cold she didn’t reply to most of my messages.

    later she said she’s not ready for a relationship
    (which I didn’t ask her, but I do want it)

    The reasons were: because she feels young (she’s 15/16)
    She has things to fix and do in her life.

    But she stated that she really enjoyed our time together, and it’s not me it’s her 🙁

    Turns out words come out differently than acts because months have passed, since then we’re not talking.

    She acts cold to me but we keep seeing each other in our group meetings in person

    In the social meeting we have social games and small talk
    (she’s avoiding me there, we don’t speak and she can’t keep an eye contact with me for more than 3 seconds)

    I was so confused, because she was looking very interested and also by my looks because sometimes she flirted, played with her hair and her voice sounded horny..

    So I can not put a finger on what could have made her lose interest and affection if at all!

    I gave her self confident and in our group meetings, she was very happy but in the end it’s her feelings after all.

    On the table more things have happened but for that I’d need 10 more pages to fill out.

    So I’ll ask a few questions and hope you can sort it out a bit, thanks a lot!

    Anyway what I wanted to ask:

    Why she doesn’t want to quit our social group after what happened between us?

    Is it because she doesn’t care or she’s still might have feelings for me?

    Why she talks to every person in our group besides me?

    Is it because she feels uncomfortable near me or she hates me or feel hurt by me?

    And finally: do I have a chance with her in the future maybe if the both of us stay in the group and we keep being “in touch”

    or if she will turn 16 soon or grow up a bit?

    #53884 Reply

    He Speaks to Me Like a Stranger

    Why she doesn’t want to quit our social group after what happened between us?

    You joined a group for people who are dealing with a lot of issues. She probably would have quit the group whether you were involved with her or not. Those situations are scary and can often trigger things in people. Plus she may be going through something personally (like social anx and other teen problems)

    Is it because she doesn’t care or she’s still might have feelings for me?

    It may be too much for her. She asked for a group instead she left with a potential boyfriend. Younger people tend to be less sure of themselves. Maybe she isn’t ready for all that.

    Why she talks to every person in our group besides me?

    She’s avoiding you because she may not know how to explain her feelings because she doesn’t really know what they are.

    Is it because she feels uncomfortable near me or she hates me or feel hurt by me?

    It not you, ITS HER.

    And finally: do I have a chance with her in the future maybe if the both of us stay in the group and we keep being “in touch”

    I think one of the best things that you can do is to let her be. She may miss you eventually. Give her your email if she never wants to talk but NEVER tell her that she can talk to you about other guys.

    or if she will turn 16 soon or grow up a bit?

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