December 18, 2019 at 6:51 pm #39143
Hello dating logic, I need your help!
Background to the story:
I felt for a woman that I went to school with and had class with and I had a huge crush on her. I had never talked to her but I decided to follow her on twitter without her knowing me, she didn’t follow me back. My friend knew her from a while ago and decided to spread the word to her about me, I believe she was confused and told him to tell me to text her. I don’t have her number so I’m guessing she probably thought he was talking about somebody else.
I decided to apologize a week later about the confusion and she was very friendly. Suddenly when talking to her I started stumbling on words and found myself mumbling and she looked confused. Eventually I ended the convo, apologized for the confusion, and we walked away. I awkwardly said bye to her again as she said bye back but it was an awkward interaction overall.
Days later in the semester I noticed her staring through the corner of her eye in class, she sat in front of the class while I sat in the back.
One day we took a test and she finished a minute before I did, she turned it in to the teacher and walked out to the front door of the room. As she walked towards the exit I got up to turned in mine and she waited while holding the door, I looked back confused as she was holding the door thinking there was somebody else she was holding the door for but it was just me standing. I walked out and thank her for holding the door, she quietly stares at me with her head sort of down as we both stand in an empty halfway staring at each other and pause. I slowly walk towards the left side of the hall while she walks slowly towards the opposite side.
Fast forward weeks later aka this past week, I grew some balls to ask her for her number but it was after we took our final for that class. I finished the test first and waited for her in the hall. As I’m sitting she walks out the room and I get up and ask her if I could talk to her. She says yeah and I tell her how i think she’s cute and would like to get her number. I noticed throughout this interaction that she’s stroking her hair pretty fast. She responds by saying “well I kinda have a boyfriend” which I know she didn’t have a bf cause I did research on this before asking. I said okay no problem and walked away. Was she just being nice by saying she kinda had a bf and not crushing me? I probably came of as a creep i don’t know honestly. I really liked this girlDecember 19, 2019 at 7:54 am #39145
She was staring at you through the corner of her eye in class and had her head sort of down when she held the door open for you.
These are indications that she is most likely shy.
A shy girl will often find it hard to be direct with how she feels with a guy she doesn’t know.
Telling you that she “kinda” has a boyfriend indicates that she didn’t want to let you down hard.
This is typical behavior of a shy girl. It can be hard for them to give a person a direct rejection.
Hence, they will flirt around it by using kinder words.
What she said had nothing to do with whether you came off as a “creep” or not.
This is how she would reject just about anyone who approached her that she wasn’t romantically interested in.December 19, 2019 at 1:58 pm #39146
This makes sense. I’m glad you were able to clarify this since a friend of mine insisted that she “wanted” to talk to me after she was holding the door for me and we were in a hall alone staring at each other. My friend also stated that “kinda have a bf” meant that she wanted me to try harder, which now that you mention this that doesn’t make sense from my friends part. This woman I approached hasn’t had a bf in many years based on someone that’s known her for a while, she might have really high standards.December 20, 2019 at 8:21 am #39147
It may not even be that she has really high standards.
She may just not be the kind that likes to be in relationships all that much.
If she hasn’t had a boyfriend in many years, she may be quite content being single.