April 3, 2020 at 7:03 am #42135
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The question is, what to do when she says she doesn’t want to hurt you or doesn’t want to get hurt, because she got hurt in the past.
We had like 3 Dates and shes not sure if she wants to go on, b.c. of the reason above. She is thinking maybe it’s better to cut things off here where we are so it won’t hurt as much as I maybe would later.
Thankful for any advise.April 3, 2020 at 10:59 pm #42145
When she says that she doesn’t want to hurt you or doesn’t want to get hurt because she got hurt in the past, she is showing that there are still emotional issues from a previous relationship that she hasn’t gotten over.
This often means that she isn’t emotionally available to you.
She went on those three dates with you in the hopes that they would be able to help her get past her emotional hurdles as far as her past relationship is concerned.
However, if anything, those three dates may have caused even more emotional strife. She now knows that she is simply not feeling enough with you to put out the effort to see where all of this leads.
She told you that she is thinking that maybe it’s best to cut things off here so that it doesn’t hurt as much as it would later on because she already knows that she is simply not going to be able to go the distance.
She gave it three dates because she may have been telling herself that each consequent date will be better and she will be able to open herself up to you and move on from her past relationship.
Unfortunately, that didn’t happen.
It is never wise to continue trying to date someone who isn’t emotionally available to you.
You could easily wind up developing strong feelings for the person that aren’t reciprocated.
You have already been on three dates with her.
Going on more dates won’t make a difference. She already knows where she stands.
It would be best to let her go and move forward with your life.
Her emotional issues as a result of that past relationship run deep and she needs to have the time and space to deal with them.