Online Dating: Waiting For Him To Ask Me Out?

Online Dating: Waiting For Him To Ask Me Out?

You clearly feel that it is time for him to ask you out.

You have talked to him long enough to feel ready.

Men have a certain point where they feel comfortable asking a woman out.

For some, it’s quick.

They talk to you for a day or two on an online dating site and they ask you out.

For others, it takes longer.

You have only recently met this man on a dating site.

You have no idea what he considers to be the appropriate amount of time between starting a conversation with a woman on a dating site and asking her out.

To avoid putting yourself in a position where you are dealing with a time waster, you should consider a few things.

Are your conversations full of substance where he is truly trying to get to know you and get you to know him?

Does he ask follow-up questions in reference to information you gave him in the past about yourself in order to get you to elaborate?

Is he timely and consistent in initiating conversation with you and responding to your messages?

Does he try to make you laugh?

Does he tease you and flirt with you lightheartedly?

Is he open with you about his life?

All of these questions should be taken into strong consideration.

Meeting all or most of these is an indication that he is serious about getting to know you and not just on the dating site to pass the time and get attention.

Now, think about how you have been behaving.

Are you giving him the right cues?

Sometimes, men hold back on asking a woman out when they feel that she has been closed off to them or not entirely engaged.

This leads them to question whether the woman is truly interested in them.

A woman who isn’t fully engaged takes a long time to respond to a man’s message.

She may answer his questions but doesn’t ask him questions about himself and if she does, only barely, or simply to throw the same question that he asked back at him.

She isn’t creative or spontaneous at all with her questioning.

She is just going through the motions as though he is one of many guys that she is talking to on a dating site and she only has a limited time to give him her attention.

She doesn’t respond all that well to teasing or flirting, if at all.

She forgets previous conversations and constantly has to be reminded about them by the man.

She has mood swings where she is energetic and engaged during one conversation and lackadaisical and bored during another conversation.

She complains a lot.

The man becomes her outlet.

She uses him to dish about frustrations at work or life in general.

Think about the conversations that you have had with this man on the dating site so far.

Have you exhibited any of this negative behavior?

Oftentimes, exhibiting any, most or all of this type of behavior makes a man feel that the woman isn’t anywhere near as interested.

This keeps him from asking her out.

He doesn’t want to risk the possibility of wasting his time and money.

He continues to chat with the woman in the hopes that her pattern changes.

After all, he still finds her attractive.

He holds back on asking her out until he feels reassured that she is as invested in getting to know him as he has been in her.

In a situation where you have been an excellent conversationalist and exhibited none of this negative behavior and yet you haven’t been asked out, it goes back to timing.

Some men worry that asking a woman out too soon ruins their chances of getting her to meet up with him.

A week of conversation with him is not enough time for you to panic about not being asked out.

As long as you maintain great conversation with him, asking you out should happen in the very near future.

Don’t fall into the trap of waiting for too long though.

Two weeks of sustained and substantive conversation without so much as a hint about wanting to meet up is too long.

This is where you need to put your foot down.

No more waiting.

Ask him to meet up with you for coffee.

After two weeks of conversation, you have agency to do this.

At this point, anything short of a yes is a sign that you may be dealing with a man who is already taken and knows that he isn’t willing to take things this far.

Men who are already taken are a different type of time waster on dating sites.

They are very engaging and inquisitive, showing so many of the telltale signs of a guy who is truly interested in a woman.

Using a two week threshold is the best way to filter out this particular type of time waster.

Take the initiative in asking him to meet up.

This way, you are in control of your own fate in love and romance.

You joined the dating site to meet a partner.

No point in continuing to wait on a guy to ask you out simply to maintain tradition.

Dating sites and apps have changed so much of what we once considered to be the traditional way that men and women meet and court each other.