Online Dating: How To Follow-Up On Old Matches?

Online Dating: How To Follow-Up On Old Matches?

Send a message.

This is often the most effective kind of follow-up.

If these are old matches from an online dating site, you should avoid trying to send them some kind of interest signal as an attempt to see whether they are still interested in you.

Interest signals can easily be ignored or even missed.

You may feel a little bit unsure of how to go about following up on old matches being that some time may have elapsed and whatever engagement or conversation that you were having with them has long since fizzled out.

However, this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t try reengaging with them.

A very effective type of message that you can send this person is one that relates to something that they included in their dating profile.

Try not to remind this person that you were an old match that got away for whatever reason.

A big mistake that people on online dating sites make when they are trying to follow-up on old matches is when they try to jog the person’s memory by saying something like, “Hey, it’s been a while. Remember me?”

Following up on old matches with this initial approach isn’t wise.

You will often put the person in a position where they are trying to recollect who you are.

They may find it difficult to do and choose not to respond to your message so as not to be rude in telling you that they don’t remember you.

Don’t assume that this old match is going to remember you.

It is best not to put them in a position where they have to figure out who you are and what kind of interaction they may have had with you in the past.

Hence, the better approach in following up with old matches is to simply act as though you are beginning to know this person for the first time.

In other words, use the approach that you would use when you are first getting to know someone.

After all, there has been a gap in conversation with this old match.

You don’t really know what they have been up to since your last interaction with them or how much they have changed.

To make the assumption that you can simply pick up from where you left off with them would be dangerously presumptuous on your part.

However, being that these are old matches, there is a good chance that you still have a good number of things in common.

Find something in the person’s online dating profile that you can relate to.

Open up a conversation with this old match by asking them about that particular find.

Again, think of this as though you are opening up a conversation with this old match for the first time.

If this old match responds to your message, continue using the approach of getting to know them anew.

In other words, try not to bring up the fact that you were an old match to them.

Start fresh with this person.

At some point during your chats with them, they may remember you.

If they do, be nonchalant about it.

Don’t make it a big deal.

If they ask you about what happened, be honest about why the previous interaction fizzled out.

However, try not to dwell on this topic.

Try to move the conversation back to the present and focus on that.

By moving past that, you will be sending this old match the message that you want to move forward.

If they like you, there is a good chance that they will let the past go and allow this new interaction to naturally lead wherever it does.