How Do You Really Know When To Get Back To Online Dating After A Breakup?

How Do You Really Know When To Get Back To Online Dating After A Breakup?

You know when you realize that you aren’t thinking about your ex in the same capacity as you once did.

Sure, your ex comes to mind every now and then, but you don’t dwell on that image or memory.

It doesn’t make you feel sad, lonely or despondent.

It’s just an image from a moment in time that suddenly popped into your head as you were going about your business.

It disappears almost as quickly as it appeared and you don’t miss a beat.

You are right back into what you were already working on at home or wherever you were at when that image or memory of your ex popped into your head.

It’s been some time since the breakup and you are no longer waking up and checking your phone to see if he sent you a text.

You haven’t been on his social media for some time.

You don’t even remember the last time you checked to see what he posted on his social media.

You haven’t mentioned his name to friends, family or coworkers in a while.

You can’t even remember the last time that you did.

Going to places that the both of you used to frequent such as a local gym, bakery or coffee shop, doesn’t cause a shock through your system making you feel paralyzed.

It doesn’t trigger old memories of your ex.

If any memory is triggered, it’s about your last visit to that coffee shop and how delicious and crisp the croissant was.

Today, you can’t wait to purchase another delicious croissant along with your favorite latte from your favorite barista.

When you are driving and a song comes on that the both of you used to love singing to, it doesn’t make you nostalgic or bitter.

You remember that it was a favorite, but you don’t turn the channel out of despair.

You sing along like you would do in the past and when the song segues into a new one, your mind isn’t dwelling in the past.

You are still very present, aware that you are listening to the next song and driving.

When you aren’t still emotionally attached and weary from a breakup, your mind and body provide the evidence.

Your mind and body become hermetically aligned.

It is this alignment that lets you know for sure that you are ready to get back to online dating.

People make themselves believe that they are over a breakup when they really aren’t.

They think that blocking the ex was a sign that they have moved on from them.

Yet, they are still thinking about the ex and soon find themselves unblocking said ex after a fairly short period of time.

They have told themselves that they have gotten over the breakup as they have unfollowed that ex on social media.

But, they are still posting messages on their social media about their emotions and hurt.

People can make themselves believe a lot by what they tell their minds.

Your mind cannot be the only barometer that you use to determine whether you are over your ex.

You can make your mind believe whatever you want it to.

Your bodily actions need to match what your mind is making you believe.

An act here or there in defiance of this ex isn’t a true determiner that you have gotten over your breakup.

Widespread and sustained action is.

Then and only then will you really know that you are ready to get back to online dating.