Some people have no trouble meeting a bunch of their matches and others never get a date even after months of matches and conversations on a dating site.
Sure, it can get frustrating when you get matches that ultimately never result in a real life meeting even after weeks or months of conversation, but you do have a lot more control over this issue than you realize.
As this is clearly a pattern, you should take a closer look at what you have been doing.
There are some people who join online dating sites for the attention, having no intention to meet anyone that they converse with online.
Unfortunately, you can’t really do anything about matches like this.
But, most people who join online dating sites are looking to connect with someone that they can hopefully get to see in person eventually.
As long as you are on a legitimate online dating website, the majority of matches that you will receive will be of people who are serious about meeting.
Take a look back at the matches that you have had in the past and how those conversations went.
You may notice that there is a pattern of behavior that is causing these conversations to never end up in a real life meeting.
A popular mistake to look for is in how monotonous your conversations become.
People often try to stick with a dull and predictable line of conversation so as not to appear too desperate or risk saying the wrong thing.
You will notice that your conversations started on a high note with this person, but as the weeks passed, they became a lot less energetic.
You went from multiple sentences being used in response to your messages to perhaps a sentence or two.
This is where the conversations have become dull and way too monotonous.
This is where you lose the interest of the person.
They are no longer excited about you and are beginning to tune out of the correspondence.
Its no wonder that this person never materialized in person to meet you on a date.
They got bored.
You need to keep your conversations fresh and fun when conversing through an online medium.
You are already at a disadvantage when using a medium where the people that you are conversing with don’t get to see your body language.
They don’t get to see you animated or even hear the intonations of your voice.
This is why you need to change topics fairly quickly as you converse with this person online so as to keep things fresh.
It is also a good idea to change from texting each other to talking on the phone or doing video chats within an appropriate amount of time, after the initial introductory and polite text exchanges have been had.
Obviously, you should be considerate of what medium of communication the other person is comfortable with and never force anything.
But, you should still keep those conversations fresh by suggesting other ways to communicate once the preliminary text exchanges are done.
This could be as soon as within the first week of chatting with this person online or it could be within the first two weeks.
The speed at which you do this depends on the ease of conversation and the kind of chemistry you have been having with the person.
As you keep conversations fresh and change mediums of communication, you should ask to meet up at an appropriate point.
Taking too much time to do this is often what leads to disinterest.
You need to ask to meet up while the conversations are still going strong between the both of you and the interest is palpable.
Normally, this should be within a month of meeting and having conversations with this person online.
If you go beyond a month, you run the risk of this person either thinking that you aren’t interested in meeting them which leads them to start losing interest in you or your conversations could start feeling all too familiar as you recycle topics over and over again.
If you want to start meeting your matches on a real life date, you need to start taking all these measures asap.
Join The Discussion
- Is it normal to have only gotten 1 right swipe in 2 days on a dating app?
- 16 hours, 35 minutes ago