In most circumstances, the person that you are meeting on a first date is nervous too.
It is easy to talk on an online dating site.
There is a sense of anonymity that comes with text messaging each other on an online dating site.
A first date is a different story.
Things have gotten real.
You are meeting this person for the first time in a real life venue.
Yes, this easily causes nerves.
The longer you have chatted with this person, the more the nerves.
There are set expectations that you both have. These are expectations that you are both fearful won’t be met on that first date.
Is this person going to like how I look?
Am I going to like how they look?
Do we get along?
Is conversation as easy as it was on the online dating site?
Am I safe with this person?
How does the date end?
The doubts and questions are easily overwhelming the more you think about that first date.
That is why you shouldn’t be thinking about that upcoming first date.
First date nerves are easily created when you are thinking about that first date too much.
When you allow that first date to be a frequent part of your thoughts, your mind creates negative scenarios that gives you nerves.
Don’t think about it.
It has been set and you already know when and where it is.
Go about your week like any other week.
Focus on your habitual tasks and routines.
Whenever thoughts about the first date creep into your mind, redirect your thoughts to a task that you are doing or need to get done.
Treat that week like any other week.
The less your mind focuses on the first date, the less scenarios it creates about all that can go wrong.
This helps to get you to the day of that first date with a lot more confidence.
Now that the day has arrived and time is getting closer to leave for the first date, your mind wants to focus on it a lot more.
It wants to play out how that first date goes, like a movie playing in your mind.
Don’t let it.
Keep yourself preoccupied until it is time to prepare for the date.
This means that you stay busy doing your tasks and sticking with your normal routines until it is time to prepare for the date.
Choose an outfit that you have worn before and that you know you love.
A familiar outfit that is a favorite of yours gives you a sense of familiarity and calms your nerves.
Avoid wearing something that you haven’t before.
This is no time to experiment with a brand new outfit.
You already know that you are prone to having nerves before a first date.
Wearing an outfit that is new and you have no history with easily creates a set of new worries which only exacerbates how worried you are overall.
Does this new color look good on me?
Does this material look good on my skin?
Does this new outfit fit me right or do I look fat?
These are new worrisome questions that you don’t need.
Stick to a favorite outfit that you have worn before.
This eliminates the chances of you asking new anxious questions about a new outfit that you just bought for the date.
There is more than enough time to experiment with new outfits if you go on more dates with this person.
Give yourself a lot of time to get to the date.
Leave several minutes early, even if you are familiar with the location and have a very good idea on how long it takes for you to get to it from where you live.
Leaving early keeps you from getting even more anxious if you were to run into traffic or something that causes a delay on the road.
This causes the nerves to come to the surface again as you worry about being late to the date.
Leave your place early with a lot of time to spare in case of unexpected delays on the road.
When you arrive at the date, be confident in who you are.
Always remember that it is your personality that got you to this first date in the first place.
Be true to it.
Your date is nervous too.
Showing confidence in your demeanor makes it a lot easier for your date to feed off your energy.
This helps the both of you relax.
When you are both relaxed, it is so much easier for the both of you to be yourselves and chat freely.
A few minutes into the date, any nerves that existed before the date are completely gone.
Just as on the dating site, your personalities are compatible and you both can breath a sigh of relief.
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