Online Dating: Why Do People Get Their Feelings Hurt Because Someone Hasn’t Immediately Replied To Their Message?

Online Dating: Why Do People Get Their Feelings Hurt Because Someone Hasn't Immediately Replied To Their Message?

People often want immediate gratification.

Unfortunately, as the use of technology has pervaded our culture, this desire for immediate gratification has become that much more pronounced.

When people on an online dating site get their feelings hurt because someone hasn’t immediately replied to their message, they are looking for that gratification without delay.

They often mistake a dating site for a shopping site where they can just click on items they want and have them magically deposited in their virtual cart, ready for checkout.

They forget that they are dealing with human beings on the other side of their keyboards.

When they don’t get that immediate or quick response and find themselves having to wait for a number of hours, they can take that personally.

Instead of coming to the very true reality that they are dealing with a human being on the other side who has real life responsibilities and may not be available to respond to their message immediately as a result, they take it personally.

They make themselves believe that this person’s lack of an immediate response must be because they are trying to humiliate or ignore them.

After barely waiting for a few hours, if that, they may feel the need to retaliate.

Perhaps they send another message, but this time, they are not playing nice.

They are berating or vilifying you for taking “so long” to respond to their initial message.

They may even shame you.

Unfortunately, you are at the receiving end of this harassment at no fault of your own.

You were unable to respond to the initial message because you were preoccupied with work, a chore, a project, at an event, sleeping, exercising, traveling, walking your dog, etc.

But, this person doesn’t care.

You didn’t immediately respond to their message and now their feelings are hurt and they feel the need to retaliate.

When you get the chance to check your online dating account after you were innocently engaged in whatever activity that was preoccupying your time, you are now confronted with multiple messages from a person that you don’t know who is berating or vilifying you for not immediately responding to a message that you have only now had the time to read.

What a bummer.

You weren’t prepared for this nor did you ask for it.

Try not to take this personally.

If you allow yourself to get upset and proceed to message this person back, you will only get yourself caught up in a rabbit hole of senseless arguing.

It will not just stop with an angry response from you.

This person will reply to your response with even more vitriol and before you know it, the both of you will be going back and forth with insults like a bitter married couple.

This isn’t worth your time or energy.

You have better things to do.

This person wouldn’t have been a good match for you anyway.

If they weren’t patient enough to wait a few hours to get a response from you to their first message, they will be just as inconsiderate in a relationship.

Imagine having to deal with a relationship partner who could care less about your time.

A partner who only wants to have their time fulfilled for their own selfish reasons without any consideration of how you would like to spend some of your own personal time.

This person has actually done you a favor in being this impatient.

You can avoid this train wreck that is just waiting to happen.

Do yourself a favor.

Quietly delete and block this person.

There is no point wasting your time and energy in getting sucked into an argument with them.