The goosebumps are real.
There is a match with a woman on a dating app and you are stumped for what to say.
How to open a conversation leaves you rapt with nerves.
The more attractive the match, the more nervous you get.
Your brain is going into overdrive trying to figure out what to say to her as an opener.
You have never been particularly good when it comes to sending messages on a dating app.
There have been attempts made in the past that weren’t met with a response.
That hurt your self-esteem.
It never feels good to get a match, muster up the courage to send an opening message, and have her not bother responding.
These incidents make it that much harder for you to send messages to new matches you receive.
Furthermore, keeping a conversation going with a match is a struggle for you too.
Too nervous, you end up having vanilla conversations that rarely last.
Don’t be too harsh on yourself.
There are lots of guys who get nervous when it comes to sending messages on a dating app.
They freak out like you do in their plight to open a conversation.
You are making a similar blunder, in overthinking it.
When you overthink how to go about sending a message to a new match, it messes with your mind, leaving you in a bad place.
You either take too long to finally come up with a message to send or you send a message that is too generic and safe in nature.
Don’t overthink it.
Remember, the match is human too.
She isn’t perfect.
She is a flawed human being, like you.
You are instantly doing yourself a disservice when you put a new match on a pedestal.
Doing this means that you are already putting this woman above you and that never works in your favor.
Look at her as a regular human being.
A human being who has her own insecurities, like every human being on this planet.
With this mindset, send an opening message that makes her excited to respond.
Start with asking an open-ended question about something she spoke about in her dating profile.
That gets her excited about replying to your message.
Once you get into a conversation with her, stop fretting over how to keep it going.
Let the conversation flow naturally.
Ask her follow-up questions to answers she provides to your questions, and wherever you can relate to her answers with examples from your own personal life, do that.
This is the easiest way to keep a conversation going.
Use whatever you learn from her in the conversation to open up a new line of questioning when it feels like the time is appropriate to introduce a new topic.
An opening conversation is like a tree in view.
From its base, it rises and extends into branches.
The base is the start of the conversation.
The branches are the follow-up questions that lead to new topics.
When you keep this strategy in place in your mind, you lose the nerves, bolster your confidence, and end the nervousness when it comes to sending messages on a dating app.