Online Dating: Should I Offer To Pay Or Not At The Date?

Online Dating: Should I Offer To Pay Or Not At The Date?

You shouldn’t offer to pay at the date.

This lowers your value.

You need to set the tone early with this guy that you met through online dating, that you are the prize.

Offering to pay at the date will increase the likelihood that he won’t even look at that meeting as a date.

It would be like the both of you are old friends meeting up after not having seen each other in a while and paying your own ways at the end of the meeting.

This is not what this is.

This is a date.

You have to set that tone.

This being said, you should still make sure that you are always financially prepared to pay your own way when you go on a date.

Do not automatically make the assumption that this guy that you met through online dating will just pay for the entire date.

Oftentimes, girls make the mistake of going to a date fully believing that the guy is going to pay for all of it.

They may have gotten used to the fact that whenever they have offered to pay at a date with guys that they have been out with in the past, the guys always turn them down and pay for the date.

They get so used to this after a while that they stop going to dates financially prepared.

They don’t bring a credit or debit card with them.

They merely have pocket change on them, if they have any change at all.

When it comes time to pay at the end of the date and they have now unexpectedly met a guy who is actually not willing to pay for their end of the date, these girls put themselves in a very awkward and embarrassing position.

They are unable to pay their own way because they didn’t come to the date venue with enough money or any means to pay.

Keep that in mind when you go on this date.

If he is a true gentleman or a guy that understands the value of your time, he will pay for the date without any hesitation at the end of it.

Regardless of how charming conversation has been with this guy on the online dating site, you don’t really know for certain whether he will pay for a date until he does.

This is why it is always best to protect yourself and go to a date completely prepared to pay your own way.

Be aware of what you can afford at this time so that you don’t go somewhere that is too expensive for your wallet.

Now that you have come fully equipped to pay your own way at the date, you know that you are prepared for whatever route this guy chooses to take when that bill arrives at the end of the date.

Again, being that this is only the first date and thereby very early in the process of being courted, you shouldn’t offer to pay your own way.

In order to make this guy understand that he is getting the benefit of your time and this is not some kind of meeting between two “online” friends, you should allow him to pay for the date.

This is what will typically get a guy to feel invested in actually courting you.

This is how you are able to make him understand that your time has value.

By offering to pay your own way at the end of the date, you would be decreasing your level of value.

You would be essentially sending the message that you do not place any value on your time.

You would be making it seem as though he did you a favor in showing up to this date.

That never leaves a guy with a good impression about you.

Your time is worth something.

Sure, in time, if you were to go out on more dates with this guy, you should most certainly start offering to pay from time to time so that he never feels like you are just using him to pay for dates.

However, at this early stage, you should let him pay.

Again, allowing the guy to pay for the date will often give him the understanding that spending time with you has value.

When you get to the end of the date and the bill arrives, you shouldn’t offer to pay.

If he is a true gentleman or a guy who understands the value of your time, he will reach for the bill and pay for the date.

If you are worried about not wanting to come off as a user if you were not to offer to pay your own way at this point, you shouldn’t.

Again, remember that this is not some meeting between two old friends that just happen to reconnect with each other online.

You are out on a date.

A date has monetary value.

Again, if you are the type of person who feels like you want to pay your own way on dates all the time, you may have to ease off on that for now.

Let this guy feel like he is actually courting you by paying for the date.

This will make him more invested in the process of getting to know you.

In order to determine whether he intends to pay for the date, you should give him about ten minutes to reach out for the bill after it arrives.

If he hasn’t reached out for the bill within ten minutes of its arrival, you shouldn’t panic.

Being that you already came to the date financially prepared, you are covered.

At this point, simply pull out your purse with every intention of paying your own way.

This would be another opportunity for this guy to reach for the bill and take care of all of it.

If he still doesn’t, then he is most likely not intent on paying for the date.

Make sure that you only pay your own way and not his.

It is now left to you to decide whether you would want to see this guy again.