Past negative experiences in dating have an adverse effect on people.
Whether it be instigated by a bad dating history in the real world, or a bad dating history with people they match with on a dating app.
This gets to people psychologically.
We are human after all.
We can only take so much failure in dating before it spills over into how we start off on our dating profiles.
In a perfect world, people put all their negative past history in dating aside when they sign up on a dating app, and construct their dating profiles free of negative influence.
Instead of writing from anger and frustration, they write from optimism.
This isn’t how many of us function as human beings.
When you come across a dating profile of a guy who has reached the end of his rope on account of his negative history in dating, it is manifested in what he writes on his dating profile.
As he writes, he is filled with thoughts about his negative history in dating.
He is thinking about a time he wasn’t yet on dating apps and was meeting girls at clubs or nightclubs who stood him up on dates that were agreed upon.
Or his previous history on dating apps where he matched with girls who chatted with him for a while, only to ghost him after arranging a date with him.
There is so much negativity permeating through his mind at this moment.
As he writes, all of that negativity is at the forefront of his thoughts.
This galvanizes him into starting off with negativity, raging about what he doesn’t want in a potential partner, as opposed to touting the qualities he possesses.
On top of this, he starts off with negativity with an intent to protect himself.
He is preparing himself for failure, expecting that just as he has struggled in dating in the real world, the same is likely on a dating app.
By starting off with such negativity in what he writes on his dating profile, he prepares himself for the possibility of failure.
If he so happens to match with a girl on a dating app and it doesn’t work out, he gets to tell himself that he knew that it was bound to fail all along, given that she is like every one of the girls he has struggled in wooing in the past.
This is how he removes any responsibility of failure from his shoulders.
It sets him up for never having to be disappointed anymore.
This is what we do as human beings.
We prepare ourselves psychologically for failure by applying negativity from the get-go.
With this approach, failure doesn’t hurt as much.
He doesn’t want to hurt anymore.
In using negativity, he is taking the cowardly route to protect himself mentally and emotionally.
He is already assuming that he is destined to fail, and uses negativity to absolve himself of responsibility, which softens the blow of any future failures.