You have created the best possible dating profile you can come up with, replete with awesome photos and a descriptive bio.
On top of this, you have taken the liberty of sending the first message to a few guys you have matched with.
Opening messages to them have always been thoughtful.
You comment on something to do with their dating profile or something you two have in common.
The work has been put in and yet, you are constantly getting ghosted or being ignored.
Although you don’t have an issue receiving matches, it doesn’t get much further than that.
These men don’t initiate messages to you and when you initiate messages to them, the majority don’t respond.
You are at your wit’s end.
It seems like you are trying too hard and you are flummoxed on what to do.
This is never a good place to be.
I know that you are in the midst of pulling your hair out right now.
So far, you have done what you were supposed to.
You created a thoughtful dating profile with great photos and a well-thought-out bio.
You haven’t sat back and waited on men to message you.
You have been proactive in initiating messages to men and using the right openers.
You are doing it right.
Now, that being said, there is a reason why it feels like you are trying too hard.
No, it has nothing to do with how often you have initiated messages to men.
It is more to do with how you behave afterward.
Putting all of your romantic hopes on dating apps puts you in a mindset that is too reliant on the outcome.
These men can sense it.
When you message them, you are too intent on receiving their response.
You wait around, with your fingers crossed.
You remain online for way too long as you wait.
Habitually, you view his dating profile multiple times as you wait, worried about when or whether you will receive a response.
This is a turn off to lots of men.
Although you are doing everything right in how you have gone about creating your dating profile and initiating messages, you are too eager to get a response, and this is causing you to stay online for far too long, as you obsessively view the dating profiles of the men you have messaged over and over again.
This is where you are failing.
Men can read desperation in a woman and that is a turn off.
Even though nothing in your dating profile or message looks desperate, what you are doing as you wait for a response is coming off as desperate.
So, you need to take a breath.
Don’t get flustered as you await a response from someone.
Get offline and go do something fun or constructive.
The energy you generate when you are away from dating apps is potent.
It rejuvenates you.
Meanwhile, you are away from the dating apps and that makes you come off as though you have a life away from it.
This is a turn on for many guys.
All of a sudden, the next time you log back on, you have a response from him.
It’s not that you are trying too hard with what you are doing on dating apps, it’s that you are too desperate for an outcome you want and the resulting behavior is turning these men off.
This is what has you spending way too many hours on a dating app each day, when you should be out in the world living your best life.
Women who seem like they have a life away from dating apps are prone to receive responses.